— New York City, NY
“Please be aware that packages and bags are subject to search,” runs the normal Metropolitan Transportation Authority (MTA) announcement. Conductors stick to the script regardless of age, race, gender, or creed. Day in and day out they deliver the same warning to the thousands who ride the New York City subways. Then, once in a long while, someone grows bored and the fun starts.
“Please be aware that your personal possessions are subject to search,” warmed up a conductor one evening.
“We are not the NYPD,” he continued.
“we are not the NYFD,”
“- New York’s Finest!”
“But we are the MTA. We run this city. We always have. And we always will.”
Our fun-loving and verbose conductor was not yet finished; he still had a stop to announce; “125th Street is next. Home of the world’s world’s world’s famous Apollo Theater. It is rainy outside and verrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrry slippery, therefore we ask that you do not walk between the yellow and or orange lines. Please be safe and watch where you step.”
And then, with this final thought, he turned off the mic; “This is a Bronx-bound 1 train experience.”